For the Good

I was so bored at work yesterday. I did have projects to do but thoughts about resigning and getting stuck in a company and not growing crept all over me. It made me stop working. Made me want to just go home. But God is good. He has this weird but amazing way of reminding His children about Purpose and Hope. An officemate of mine forwarded an email discussing some thoughts on Romans 8:28. It was such a great reminder for me. It made me realize again that even if I'm not happy right now, God causes all things to work together for our good.

Anyway, here's the forwarded e-mail message that I got:

Work together for the good

"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them" Romans 8:28

Every person goes through disappointments and things that don't seem to make sense and think, "Why did this happen to me?" "Why did my loved one not make it?" "Why did this person treat me wrong?" "Why did I get laid off?" I had a friend recently tell me how he lost his job after many years. He just didn't understand it. He said, I gave that company my best. I was always there on time. I was loyal. It's just not right."We have to understand that even though life is not always fair, God is fair. He promises that He will work all things together for our good. I believe the key word in today's verse is "together." In other words, don't just isolate one part of your life and say, "Well, this is not good." "It's not good that I got laid off." "It's not good that my loved one got sick." "It's not good that my relationship didn't work out." Yes, that's true, but that's just one part of your life. God can see the big picture. That disappointment is not the end. Your life doesn't stop because of one setback. That is simply one piece of your puzzle. There is another piece coming to connect it all because God promises to work all things together for your good. God bless you !

Rethinking My Career

I am now 25 years old. I've been working as a creative writer for a TV Network here in the Philippines for more than five years now and I'm seriously rethinking what career path I should pursue for the future. I wrote previously in my entry Career Vs. Calling that I'm having trouble about my current situation right now as an employed person - considering that I'm not getting any younger and a secured and happy future is all that matters.

For the past few weeks, I've been rekindling some interests that I have somehow laid to rest years before when I started working. I'm drawing again, making arts and crafts, and getting myself involved in the art of makeup. I even went on a spur-of-the-moment makeup shopping last night.  And when I got home, I rushed through dinner and washed up right after so I can experiment on the new eyeshadow, eyeliner and blush that I bought. Inspired much by Michelle Phan (the Youtube makeup guru who really inspired me a lot), I gathered all my creative juice and knowledge about makeup and whipped up a "new" look. And here's the result of my quarter life career crisis: 

I think I need to adjust the lighting of the photos more. My eyeshadow color was supposed to be pink and the yellow light washed it away. I think I need to study photography too. Haha. Anyway, seriously after this makeup adventure, I did thought of venturing into being a makeup artist. My mom even asked me the other night, after seeing me curling my sister's hair using a 2-in-1 hair iron, what kind of career do I really wanted to pursue. And I told her half jokingly that I wanted to be makeup artist/hair dresser and I wanted to put up my own beauty salon. (o.O)

Anyway, I really have no answers yet to my career questions. But I'm going to do more of this makeup stuff and I'm going to draw and paint more. I guess this will be my therapy for the moment. And maybe I can pick up some inspiration from these interests to help me decide what I really want to pursue. Maybe I'm really a makeup artist after all :p.

Career vs. Calling

This morning, I had the privilege of listening to Pastor Neil Varias preaching in our church's anniversary program. He was talking about perfecting holiness and how to live a victorious life. It was really an inspiring message. Besides the fact that Pastor Neil was such an animated speaker, his preaching really got me hooked that I took down notes. Thinking about it, there was this one part where he touched the difference between a career and a calling. This was when he was talking about focusing on the purpose which God intended for us to fulfill. Anyway, he said that the difference between a career and a calling is that a career is something that you do that you get paid for and that a calling is something that you do that money cannot pay for. A calling is something that God can only reward you for doing. He also said that sometimes, God prepares us for our calling by placing us in a specific career.

And then it hit me.

Now that I've been working as a creative writer for the past five years, it suddenly made me think about what I've accomplished. What I've REALLY accomplished. I know that God is the one who gave me this job. He's the one who orchestrated everything for me to be where I am right now. But why is it that I'm not happy? Why is it that all the fulfillment that I get from my said "career" is just superficial? What's missing? And why is it that when I'm in church, I don't mind getting tired? Even if some people in church can get really annoying, why is it that I have more patience for them? My back hurts, my arms get tired, my voice gets hoarse, yet I'm happy. But I'm not getting any younger. I'm 25 years old already and I can't just throw away everything. I need a plan. I need to pray. I need to fast. I need to spend more time with God. I need to stop.

Also, last week, I felt like I was constantly being "bullied" in the office. People keep on demanding things from me. Demanding me to squeeze out everything I can out of my so-called "creative" brain. Well, God has made me creative. It's that specific talent that He gave me and that I'm happy and ever grateful for. But when demands like these come my way, I feel like a kid being asked by a bully for lunch money. Argh! I want all of these to stop! If only I have the luxury to quit my job.

Sigh. I just really pray that God will help me through this. Maybe this is what they call quarter life crisis. But maybe I'm just tired. Maybe I just need a change. Maybe I just to spend more time with God.